I've been struggling with my age. Not the number per se, but more the idea of getting older. Aging, more so. It never used to be something that bothered me but more and more it's constantly on my mind.
I don't want to get older. I don't want to age. I don't want to get to the point where my age affects my health and I'm on that downward spiral. I don't want to lose my parents as they get older. Or my friends. Or my friends' parents. I don't want any of it.
I'm not delusional. I know that's not possible. We all age, some a little and some a lot. We all die. It's just a matter of how. Wow this has gotten depressing!
I wonder, Would you rather go suddenly or know that your time is coming to end? If you choose to know, how much time is really enough? One day? One week? One year? Would it really affect your everyday life in what you do? I mean, say you always wanted to go sky diving. Would knowing that you definitely only have a certain amount of time left encourage you to go and jump out of that plane tomorrow?
I don't think I would want to know. Personally, I think I'm better off not knowing. That being said, i still don't want to age and face all that. I hear lots of people say that their 30's and 40's were their best years. Am I looking forward to the best? Of course I am. But do I really need to get older to do that? Why can't the best years be right now?
So I ask, What will it take to make you live your life now? To live it to the absolute fullest?
You never know when you won't be able to do these things you want to do, so just do it. Do everything you want to do and don't make excuses. Sounds simple enough, now let's make it happen.
